In this post, former ME/CFS sufferer and Coach Simon Pimenta explores perfectionism and strategies for dealing with perfectionism if you have ME/CFS and this trait.
Note: I am not suggesting that all people with ME/CFS have this trait. I don’t believe that to be the case. Having worked with many people with ME/CFS for 11 years, I observe that some people recognise the trait within themselves to some degree, others do not.
Are You A Perfectionist?
Actually, instead of asking ‘Are you a perfectionist?’, it might be more useful to ask ‘Do you exhibit perfectionist tendencies at times?’ as the former question labels people; it suggests that a person is always a perfectionist, which is unlikely.
Perfectionism is setting excessively high standards and going above and beyond what is required.
Maslow’s hierarchy proposes the theory that people are motivated to meet their needs in order to thrive, from basic needs; physiological needs, to higher needs; such as self esteem, self-actualization and self-transcendence (a term he added some years after the initial model he proposed).
We all have needs, that if not met, will have consequences.
I appreciate that getting your needs met when you have ME/CFS and don’t have the support you need, can make life difficult.
Binge & Bust
One thing I noticed when I had ME/CFS, is that I would go through a cycle where I would: Continue reading →
In Danny Wallace’s book, Yes Man (a very funny, daft and uplifting book), the author meets a man on a bus who tells him to say yes more, in response to hearing Danny say he has got stuck in a rut.
He sets himself the challenge of saying yes to everything. It results in many adventures, some amusing, some potentially detrimental. For example, he nearly ended up in a fight and if I recall correctly, taking some pills of dubious quality he bought online.
One of his learnings from the experience is that he needed to be discerning and say no in some situations!
Anyone with ME/CFS would love to be able to say yes more, but are unable to due to extreme physical and mental exhaustion, and other symptoms.Continue reading →
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it."
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
"Simon always made me feel that things would get better and more importantly he had the tools to make that happen."
- Martine McCutcheon "Thank you again so much, Simon. I am so grateful to you and happy that I can sustain good health and happiness like this - I feel like the luckiest girl in the world!"
- Loveday "Thank you very much Simon for all your excellent teaching and support."
- Helen "Completing the training was a real eureka experience. The training has provided me with practical tools to cope in challenging situations, whether at work or in daily life."
- Natalie "Working with Simon over a period of months recently was really helpful with my extreme fatigue. I now have much greater self-awareness and understanding of my condition and how to beat it."
- Ivan "Simon was jam-packed with knowledge and use of the tools, which meant he was especially understanding and patient, and armed with an answer to any problem!"
- Hayley "Thank you so much for everything, I feel like the old Clare again loving life!".
- Clare "I am far more confident and I know I can do anything I set my mind to."
- Thomas, Extreme Anxiety and Depression "I can hardly believe the changes, my life is back and my happiness is back. Thank you so much again."