Someone asked me this thought-provoking question on an ME Forum recently:
What is ONE piece of advice you would give to others who are trying to achieve recovery?
My advice would be (short answer):
Don’t underestimate the power of calm.
Without doubt, understanding stress, how I could generate it without even realising it and how to switch it off was, I believe, key to my recovery. Just to be clear; that’s my opinion. I can’t prove it.
This is a simple idea, the application of the idea can be challenging.
I remember a client who was training with me saying that on the 2nd module, she arrived at the station feeling exhausted. It was a 20 minute walk to the clinic. In the past, she would have started generating stress about the symptoms:
“I’m so tired. Am I going to be able to… keep up with the training? Will I pay for it tomorrow? Will it cause a relapse?…” etc, etc.
That was her consistent response to symptoms, a habitual way in which she would talk to herself.
You may be familiar with this kind of thinking.
In my free report ‘ME/CFS Essential Information’ I explain what stress is. Based on 10 years of working with people with ME, most people I’ve worked with don’t fully understand this perspective.
I explain how stress can impact on normal healthy people, and can make them sick.
The client decided to apply the simple tools she had learnt in the first module, and focussed on being calm.
She told me that after 10 minutes, she noticed that she started feeling better, so that by the time she got to the clinic, she was feeling good.
You have probably experienced something similar, maybe without consciously realising it.
Most people with ME have periods where they seem to feel better, but don’t link these periods with the times that they have felt generally more relaxed.
If you have, great. It means you already have some awareness of the ‘power of calm’.
If you haven’t, I would invite you over the next week or so to notice how:
1. When periods of stress result in feeling worse
2. When periods of calm result in feeling better
Think of the implications of that.
If we could learn how to handle stress more effectively and to access states of calm, would that have a positive impact?
When I had Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for ME, the psychologist told me that I need to ‘deal with the stress’, but didn’t tell me exactly how to do this.
Being trained as a Counsellor, I had some ideas about how to do this. However, the tools I had weren’t enough to make a real difference. They just didn’t cut it.
In time I learned effective techniques to:
1. Identify the unhelpful responses, including responses that I was not consciously aware of.
2. Interrupt them.
3. Create new, more useful responses.
The first step is to identify the unhelpful patterns that could be hindering your recovery. I offer a free coaching session where we do just that.
If you would like to book a session, you can contact me here
Wishing You Good Health!
Simon
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SIMON PIMENTA is a hypnotherapist, coach and trainer working with people to boost resilience, and minimise stress. After working in a demanding job as the Director of a Housing Trust, he went off sick and remained unable to work for the next 8 years.
He discovered a pioneering approach to resolving health issues and quickly got back his health, and now trains others using these same techniques, to help them become happier, healthier and achieve their goals.